Recently, in a session, I was going on and on about how important self-care is as a way to manage PNES better. My patient stopped me and said, can I ask what do you mean by self-care because for me I’ve started eating more regularly and resting but I wonder if this is what you mean by it?
I was so glad she spoke up—because it reminded me how easy it is for us in the field to assume our language, concepts, and tools are clearly understood. They often aren’t. Her question opened a great conversation and inspired this post.
For Psychology, self-care includes basic physical maintenance like healthy eating or rest but goes beyond that. It is the intentional, proactive practice of caring for your whole self—physical, emotional, and mental—to maintain well-being, manage stress, build resilience, and prevent burnout.
What do psychologists mean by Emotional and Psychological Self-Care?
It involves caring for yourself and there are a multitude of ways to do this:
- Awareness and processing: Practices like journaling to record daily experiences and explore emotions, or mindfulness/meditation exercises such as practicing a body scan or dedicating time every day for a deep breathing exercise.
- Boundaries and protection: Learning to say “no” when needed, learning to speak up and to speak clearly, and protecting your time and energy.
- Nurturing joy and self-compassion: engaging in a new hobby or creative outlet (e.g., the arts, music, movement), or intentionally enjoying simple pleasures, savoring life (e.g., enjoying a good cup of coffee or sitting on a bench listening to nature). It also means practicing self-compassion—speaking to yourself kindly during setbacks instead of harsh self-criticism (e.g., checking inner dialogue for judgmental, critical words, catastrophizing thinking, etc.).
- Seeking connection and support: Reaching out to trusted people or professionals (like therapy), engaging in prosocial behaviors (volunteering), and in pleasurable social interactions (e.g., going out with your spouse for a quiet dinner, spending time with your best friend, or attending a PNES support group).
What do we mean by physical self-care?
Caring lovingly for your body. Making sure you are rested, well-nourished, hydrated, engaging in safe physical exercise, attending regular medical check-ups, etc.
For some patients these changes in behavior and attitude may seem unfamiliar and may be seen as selfishness but that’s not accurate. Self-care is learning to balance our love for ourselves with our care for others in our lives.
If you’re living with PNES, think about how self-care might look for you.